Category Archives: all natural

Bacon and Celery Root Egg Skillet

Bacon and Egg Skillet MLM

 

Didn’t even get the word leeks to fit into that fully stuffed title.

This casserole/skillet will leave you just as deliciously filled and nutritiously plump. Oh wait, it’s low carb and keto friendly so plump is never on the menu. 

Eat delicious foods that keep your body at a weight losing detox is the slogan of the keto world. We up those fats and cut the carbs to where every bite is fully sweetened with only the subtleties of food flavor.

This skillet cuts potatoes and instead uses celery root. I use this veggie wonder of low carb nighthood to make up for the lack of potato in my life all the time. At this point the potato seems dull in comparison to my favorite veggie. I cut it into fries and just fry them in a cast iron with salt and oil. I put them into stews and even spiralize them into soups. Celery Root even freezes well. What more could you ask of nature? Celery root’s main awakening into my mental food cookbook happened after having them in this celery root chicken and mushroom alfredo. Once you go celery you never go potato again…except when you twin brings home leftover BBQ stuffed into a potato and you really want that BBQ?

Holidays just make carbs  soooo accessible. I miss the keto feels of mind clarity and body readiness though, so I’m kickstarting back into the low carb world with this skillet.

The celery root has more crunch to it’s munch than the easily softened potato, but I love how the root gets soft and absorbs up all the flavor you can offer it, but still keeps some of its crunchy texture. The longer you cook it the softer it gets, but I recommend cutting a few strips off before making this dish and eat a piece raw, a piece raw and salted, and a piece that’s been cut into a fry shape and heated in the skillet for about two minutes on each side. That way you get to fully experience what this root can offer you.

Bacon and Celery Root Egg Skillet.jpg

 

Ingredients:

4 Strips Bacon

7 Eggs

1/4 Teaspoon Salt

1/4 Cup Coconut Butter

1 Cup Celery Root (chopped or sliced)

1/4 Cup Chopped Leek Leaves (optional)

Directions

  1. Preheat oven to 200 degrees.
  2. Cook the bacon mostly through and then set aside (will finish cooking in skillet).
  3. Pour about two tablespoons of the grease into a tiny saucepan and gently melt it with the coconut butter.
  4. Beat the eggs and then add in the celery root, leek, and chopped bacon.
  5. Cook over medium heat for about three minutes and then pour the melted coconut butter and bacon grease over the eggs.
  6. Transfer the skillet to the oven to finish cooking for about 10-15 minutes. I like my eggs barely cooked through so if they taste undercooked just pop them in for about five more minutes. Avoid overcooking though because they start to taste hard.

 

 

Make it paleo by foraging for it outside. You could even hide it and let your friends find it for ultimate cavemaning. Tools required: Spatula.

Foraged Skillet

 

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Cocobutter Clove Cookies

The bitter burst of winter clove is tamed into a bursting warmth of earth flavor in these coconut butter, pumpkin and clove cookies. 

I entered a cookie swap this year as a way to insert this little blog into the world. It is growing up and I think it is time for a coming out shindig with clove dresses and cookie hair pieces. There would be top hats with an extra brim in the form of a bowl that you could go around with while party people snatched up cookies at their mouth’s desire. 

You might think in your sprog that a little low carb and paleo human could not be part of a cookie swap, but it worked out super well. I was sent delicious almond cookies, ginger snap cookies, and some other cookies that accidentally fell to the ground after my roomies dogs figured out how to knock them from the table. 

Cocobutter Pumpkin Cookies

I can’t wait for the day where food has no labels but for being food. I can add so many diet labels to these when in reality all they are is coconut butter and pumpkin sweetly molded together with a burst of clove. So simple and yet so bold.

When only going for the qualitiest of ingredients one must learn how to be simple with recipes.

Even adding salt can flow out the pennies from your wallet, but when every ingredient is delicious you also get the best flavors. There is no compensation or need to hide any ingredient. Instead you can feature the ingredients and let them burst into yours and your guest’s mouths.

Coconut butter is a newer trend and is still costing a pretty penny to purchase, but making your own is super easy if you have time and a food processor or blender. You could also use a nut butter for these if you don’t feel like venturing into the delicious land of the coconut. Coconut lends a delicious level of sweet that is so natural you’ll want to turn into a cavewoman. There is no point to adding sweetener when you have the coconut. If you’re scared to venture out then you can go ahead and add the coconut sugar or honey, but I suggest trying them without it and sprinkling some on top if you change your mind. That way you get to try them without the sweetener but can still safely add some if you change your mind.

These cookies are also low carb, vegan, egg free, vegetarian, paleo, AIP friendly, Paleo friendly, gluten free, grain free, sugar free, nut free, and fodmap friendly. Serve these up at any party without fear, just don’t forget the brimming cookie top hats. 

 

Yield: 2 Dozen Cookies

Ingredients:

Cocobutter Cookies Ingredients.jpg

1 Cup Coconut Butter (DIY)

1/2 Cup Pumpkin Puree (DIY)

2 Teaspoons Cloves, Crushed into Tiny Bits (or pre-ground cloves)

Whole Cloves (1-2 per Cookie)

2 Tablespoons Coconut Sugar or Honey (optional)

Directions:

  1. Preheat the oven to 200 degrees for a slow bake or 350 for a quickie.
  2. Beat, or use a fork, to combine the cocobutter and pumpkin.
  3. Crush fresh cloves in a mortar and pestle into coarsely ground.
  4. Beat together the cloves and coconut sugar with the cocobutter and pumpkin.
  5. Lay the cookies out on a sheet. Since there are no lifters the size you make the cookies is the size they will turn out.
  6. Bake at 200 for 45-50  minutes or 350 for 12-15 minutes.
  7. Mouthgasm.

 

Visual Tutorial

  1. Preheat the oven.
  2. Beat the pumpkin puree and cocobutter together.
  3. Crush the cloves up:

Crushing Cloves

4. Combine all ingredients and then lay the cookies out onto a baking sheet:

Cookies on pan MLM

5. Press one or a couple of cloves into each cookie:

Cloved Cookie Sheet.jpg

 

 

 

Cocobutter Clove Cookies

Slow Cooker Apple Cider

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My apple cider mouth memories entail campfires and tales of old.

I vividly have a memory of a man cloaked in shadows telling us stories about olden men in spurs galloping across the planes with nothing but grits and hardened cow meat. They rode horses into battle and  streamed alpha water across the lands they conquered (think about it). He was a prop at the Christmas time of Fredericksburg, Texas, but I soaked up the memory as a happy one nonetheless. We sang carols on the bus rides to and from the little tour, and then would go to a light walk that had a little hut with elves and Santa. The first two or so years we snuggled into Santa’s lap and told him of our gift wishes. Then when we no longer wanted to sit in an old bearded man’s lap when year three came.

The best memories of these Christmas trips, and the most vivid, are of the campfire.

Cider Staring

Not because of the stories but because at the end we would get apple cider and cookies. I remember wishing he’d speed up the story just so I could cling to that warm cup of cider while my body shivered at the cold until the warmth flooded through me. The cider was sweet cinnamon with apple tastes and the cookies were also warm and served by an older grandma looking lady. I let her adopt me as a grandchild and we whisked off to cider land. I came back just to share this recipe though…kind of. Actually that wasn’t true at all. Also Santa might not be real.

Now that I’m old enough to create my own cider and bring it to upcoming Halloween and Christmas parties I want to have a cider that sticks in friend’s and families minds just the same.

The largest fulfillment a human can have from creating for people is when it also nourishes those you love. This apple cider is controlled by you and thus free of anything to be scared of. Unless of course you want a Halloween version. Then you could use some as the liquid in a Halloween cake. I’m working on a slow cooker apple cider cake soon 😉

Currently all the friend’s I’ve shared this warm liquid love with have also tried to get me to adopt them. That also isn’t true, but I’m sure it’s because I’m not old enough to look like a grandma yet. When I do though I’ll set up campfires and serve this cider with almond butter cookies.

Slow COoker Apple Cider Mind Lifting Mouthgasms

Ingredients:

Slow Cooker Apple Cider Ingredients MLM

3 Cinnamon Sticks (See notes)

6-8 Apples (See recipe notes)

1 Whole Nutmeg

1/2 Teaspoon Sliced Ginger (Optional)

1 Teaspoons Cloves

1/2 Teaspoon Whole Allspice (Optional)

6-8 Cups Fresh Filtered Water (Quality Matters)

Directions:

  1. Rinse your apples clean.
  2. Chop up your apples into fourths. Since they’ll be strained out you don’t need to deseed or destem them.
  3. Put in all of your spices into a nut bag or tied up cheese cloth. You can also just toss them in and strain them out later.
  4. Cook on low for 7 hours or high for 4 hours. Go for the low if you can for maximum spice infusion.
  5. One hour before finished use a hammer or solid object to smash the apples against the side of your slow cooker.
  6. Wait for the slow cooker to cool (or use oven mitts) and strain out the spices by ladling them out through a cheesecloth or even using a colander set over a large pot. I’ve also used a tea pot by ladling it into the tea strainer and working in batches.
  7. Store in the fridge or on the counter (mine has been on the counter at least a week).

Shhhh My Cider

Fantastic Pairings:

Serve with:

A Cinnamon stick

Gin (My Favorite)

Bourbon

Whiskey

Vodka

Turn into a Cake

Notes:

Types of Apples:

You can use red apples for a mild flavor or green ones for a more tart flavor. I used a mixture but think a pure form would do really well. Will report back.

Cinnamon:

2 sticks will also work, especially if you plan to serve it with a stick of cinnamon. I just really love for the cinnamon to be brought out.

P.S. You can hide with the cider and I won’t judge you for drinking it all.

Hidden Cider 2

Visual Tutorial

Add Spices and Apples to your Slow Cooker (or put them into a nut bag)

Apples and Spices

Fill with Water (use feet to tilt the slow cooker for better lighting)

Apples and Water MLM

Slow Cook on Low for 7 Hours of High for Four Hours

An Hour Before Finished Smash Apples into the Side

Thor Apple Smash MLM

Slow COoker Apple Cider Mind Lifting Mouthgasms

Too Easy Tuna Salad: Zero Carbs

On so many days I arrive home starving, or tipsy, and need to just consume food. In general, keto makes you feel really full as your body is so satisfied by itself, but because of this full feeling I’ll forget to eat until about four.

At this point I could go the day without food and reach epic mental clarity, but if I’m in hunger mode I’ll just nom whatever is in oral vicinity with the ravenous force of a 105 pound goddess.

So in my mind cookbook there has to be quick and easy recipes that I can make without even having eggs or mayo. I run out of both of these constantly. Because of this simple mind cookbook I’ve been saved many a fast food caving cravings, and instead pack my body full of life nutrients.

Since taste is based on nutrients (science bitches), this tastes epic and makes for such easy travel food. Grab a lemon on the road from any random grocery store and you have a delicious lunch bursting with lemon and brain nutrients. All at zero carbs and friendly for the paleo humans.

Too Easy Tuna Salad MLM

Today I’m just going zero carb in order to detox from yesterday when I decided to scoop a 1/4 cup of honey into me.

Ingredients:

Can of Tuna (Read what to get and what to avoid here)

Juice of Half a Lemon

Two Dashes of Salt

Directions:

  1. Open can and take a few bites to make room for the juice.
  2. Squeeze in juice and add salt. If you can eat the rinds of lemons go ahead and chop it into bits and add those.

Just for you: our corgi Thor. Otherwise known as Thorgi

Thorgi

Low Carb and Paleo Heirloom Marinara Sauce

 

This sauce is incredibly adaptive and could even evolve into a new veggie of mouthgasms. Watermelon marinara anyone? I kid, too much sugar. I’ve made it without the onion, with cardamon seeds, with and without fresh herbs and every time it is deep earth inside your mouth. To my mouth at least. Admittedly mine is different from yours, but I do have a twin so the likelihood of my mouth being exactly like another human’s is pretty high.

 

She still eats packaged things and even had fast food yesterday though. 

Her mouth may have evolved past mine, but I can taste the sweetness lurking in little Brussels’s leaves so mwahaha.

It isn’t killing me inside….except for all of the little Bing Bongs I didn’t notice. (Inside Out reference).

Hmm

The heirloom tomatoes are not necessary for this recipe, but they do add a complexity and variance to the recipe that I fully enjoy. You could use a can of tomatoes or other tomatoes, but you want the amount of fresh tomatoes to equal about a can of tomatoes. This recipe is easily halved as I’ve confirmed many times now. Half takes a whole spaghetti squash and 3/4 of the recipe can coat a pizza. 

Ingredients You Need:

2 Cloves of Minced Garlic

1 Small Yellow Onion or Half of a Large One (red or green also works, yellow and green have the lowest carbs, chart here)

1.5 T Olive Oil or Avocado Oil

5-7 Heirloom Tomatoes Chopped or in 8ths

Bay Leaf

1 T Whole Coriander Seeds (optional, adds earthy notes)

Dash of sal

Fresh Herbs (thyme, basil, rosemary, etc.) Optional

Fresh Made Spaghetti Squash to Serve Over (recipe here)

Wok or High Sided Sauce Pan (Wok gives out ninja feels)

To Create:

  1. Warm the olive oil over medium high heat and add the onions. Let the onions turn translucent (about five minutes) and stir or press in the garlic. Wait for the smell to seep into your nose (about 30 seconds).
  2. Add the tomatoes into the pan. You’ll want to squish them into the pan with your hands, but don’t worry if not all of the juice releases, sometimes they need to be warmed before full squishing can happen.
  3. Add your bay leaf, salt, cardamon and fresh herbs into the tomatoes. Basil comes very quickly so wait until the end to add it, if using.
  4. Resquish the tomatoes with a fork or the back of a spatula now that they have warmed. If they’re still unsquishable you can wait until the last ten minutes, but you want the juices to simmer out into the sauce (in order to become sauce).
  5. Let simmer for 20 minutes after bringing to a tiny boil/rapid simmering.
  6. Make the spaghetti squash to pour the sauce over.
  7. Halfway scrape spaghetti strings of spaghetti squash then pour the marinara into it. If you’re eating for one only use 1/4 of the marinara in half of the spaghetti squash and save the rest.
  8. Use the squash as a bowl and continue making spaghetti out of it. Do not eat the bowl

 

 

Visual Tutorial

  • Warm the olive oil

Drizzle in the Wetness

  • Add the onions. Let the onions turn translucent (about five minutes)

Simply Onions

  • Stir or press in the garlic. Wait for the smell to seep into your nose (about 30 seconds). Garlic Me
  • Add the Tomatoes with a Squish

Squish Me

  • Add your bay leaf, salt, cardamon and fresh herbs into the tomatoes.

Herbed and Spiced

  • Resquish the tomatoes with a fork or the back of a spatula now that they have warmed.
  • Let simmer for 20 minutes after bringing to a tiny boil/rapid simmering.

To be Finalized

 

Macros Per 1/4 of Recipe :

 

Total Fat: 7g, Potassium: 17.1mg, Total Carbs: 3.5g, Net Carbs: .9, Protein: 1.9g

Rich in Vitamin A (30%), Vitamin C (60.5%)

Low Carb and Paleo Hangover Smoothie

Humans keep having this assumption that I eat like a butterfly.

That’s very cute, but what I lose in bread and rice I make up for in butters and fats. I’m an odd little high fat person as I mostly use coconut oil/butter instead of dairy products. Although I consume 30 or less carbs a day I get 90% of my energy from fats. I used to drink heavy cream straight, such as in the heavy cream treat. Lately I’ve gone dairy free though since it feels uncomfortable to my insides every time I put cheese or cream in there. So I’ve just switched to coconut and food tastes even better.

I also eat tons of bacon. And then cast iron vegetables up with the grease.

There are days I’ll eat no meat or just some organ meat, but even on those days I get fats otherwise. Why the high carb low fat diet does not work is people wind up feeling starved. People wind up cheating and feeling terrible, as though they did something wrong. The body needs fat, and it tells us that.

So my weekend had kiwi chia jelly shots and melting coffee cocktails.

On this morning I want bliss soaked fats covered in bacon, with some electrolytes from salt. Most hangovers are dehydration so drinking water and boosting up those excreted electrolytes will help you feel mindloose and headache free.

Hangover Smoothie

Hangover Cocktail Ingredients

2 Slices of Bacon

1/2 Cup Almond or Coconut Milk (or Cashew). Increase for thinner smoothie.

1/4 Cup Frozen Raspberries (or blueberries, snozberries, or blackberries)

1/2 Cup Full Fat Greek Yogurt. (Leave out to decrease fat if needed, or add more coconut cream if dairy free).

1/2 an Avocado

1/2 a Teaspoon of Cinnamon

1/2 a Teaspoon of Salt

3 Coffee Cubes (freeze your leftover coffee into cubes)

Sweetener if you need it (I’m a bitter loving beastwoman and take it straight)

For Whipped Coconut Cream

1 Can Coconut Milk

(Great coconut whipped cream recipe, and what brand to buy here)

or

Heavy Cream turned into Whipped Cream

To Create:

  1. Cook bacon and put aside
  2. Blend cocktail Ingredients (except for bacon) in a high speed blender until smooth

To Make Coconut Whipped Cream

  1.  Leave can of coconut milk in fridge overnight
  2. Scoop off the cream layer into a stand mixer or hand mixer bowl
  3. Beat into stiff peaks
  4. This will leave you with extra cream. If you do not desire extra whipped coconut cream use less of the milk and store or put into smoothie

Combine:

  1. Pour smoothie ingredients into stein
  2. Top with whipped coconut cream
  3. Add raspberries and bacon
  4. Eat bacon first

Final Hangover Smoothie

Kiwi Chia Jam

The kiwi is a high fiber fruit. It even comes into your mouth at only 8 carbs per whole fruit. If you are staying under 20 that is a lot, I understand. It is a mere 1.2 net carbs per tablespoon though. If you are in maintenance or just doing the paleo game then welcome to my mouthgasms.

Every time I search what is healthy about a fruit or veggie the top search is always ‘ Item you Searched: Healthiest Food in the World” .  

Le sigh. Almost everything on this earth probably has some nutrition in it. The main issue is whether or not the human body can actually utilize those nutrients. This is why bread and grains just don’t go inside of us. They have tons of nutrition in various ways I’m sure, but we can’t absorb most of them. Also those FODMAPS are not human friendly.

If you have some time later please research this and come tell me what you find. The food our bodies absorb most tend to be vegetables, meats, and fruits. Dairy is a debate, nuts need to be soaked and grains got corrupted but seem to have once worked. Honestly it is a mind scourgy of caring and keeping up with it all. The thing is I feel so blissed out body and mind wise all day. The control I feel is barely believed due to the years I spent feeling out of control of my own mind and exercising the moment I saw any tummy fat.

The main thing you can do though is start to make things for yourself. That way you know exactly what is in it. 

The jams you get at stores tend to have preservatives and are hugged deeply by sugar. I actually have a hypothesis on why sugar does not work too well for us. The already known information is that sugar triggers our bodies into hibernation mode and causes us to store fat in preparation. This is also why you get ravenous and need more, despite if you’re fat or not. Your body is literally telling you to go find more sugar now in order to fatten you up. Remember the gingerbread house story?

So how does this affect the mind?

What if this also puts your mind into the present tense? What if this makes your connections latch onto the idea of the now, of the getting the food and storing it up? What if this causes you to stay in the same connections/thoughts to the point it is hard to have future thoughts or perception? It also makes us hyper. What if that is the body exerting tons of energy out to go and get that sugar? Waste energy now because you’ll be hibernating later. Just a hypothesis but is might make sense 😉 If you take it even further, what if it could lead to us wanting to go and be alone/hibernate? This could be part of the reason for anxiety.

About that Kiwi Chia Jam Though

It’s jam. Of course it is delicious.

Ingredients:

8 oz (about two cups) Kiwis

1/4 Cup Erythitrol, powdered

2 T Chia Seeds

1/4 Cup Water

To Create:

   1.   Chop the kiwis into small shapes. The larger the shapes the more chunky the jam will be.  For kiwis I found it easiest to slice them into rings and then peel the skin off.

Cut Kiwis

   2.   Grind your sugar in a spice grinder until powdered

Spice Grind

   3.    Coat kiwis with powdered sweetener and mix together.

Powdered Kiwis

   4.   Let release juices for about 5 minutes.

   5.   Mash kiwis with the back of a fork or go to war with a spoon. Let come to a boil.

Spoon Mash

   6.   Let the jam boil for about 7 minutes to let it thicken.

          (Imagine pictures for the following steps)

   7. Add 2 T of Chia seeds and stir for 1-2 minutes.

   8.   Remove from the heat and let cool for about fifteen minutes.

Final Kiwi Chia Jam

1.2 Net Carbs per Tablespoon