Category Archives: mouthgasm

Spaghetti Squash Egg in a Nest

Spaghetti Squash Egg in  Nest MLM.jpg

 

Spaghetti squash is that staple of the modern keto / low carb diet that you just know is going to last through the century.

It’s our version of always having a pack of noodles in the cupboard that are always ready to be made into a meal. The ingredients can even change all over it and yet that staple can be used for all of your flavors, from basil to beer braised meatballs.

What you really want in a noodle is a texture that compliments meats and sauces, and a flavor that simply absorbs other flavors, or simply remains in the dish as a layer of texture to enhance the other ingredients.

There’s definitely a shorter shelf time when you compare spaghetti squash to wheat noodles, but there’s more life to the squash, and it lends that oh so delicious health factor to the dish.

I make a squash about once a week, and after using half for some spaghetti squash and meatballs, I’ll use the other half for whatever experiment my mouth wants.

Some of them plotz, like the cinnamon and coconut cream one, but others leave me dedicated to their taste. This spaghetti squash swirled into a nest with an egg inside of it was just simple enough to be perfect on all layers. Each ingredient gets to beckon itself into your mouth and leaves nothing else but pure flavor inside you. I foresee many more recipes coming from this base idea. An egg and spaghetti squash are incredible textures with amazing health benefits in them, but they are also able to take on whatever flavor you’re feeling that day. For this recipe I used sun dried tomatoes, and they release that perfect tomato flavor, without all the juice of a fresh one, but you could try any flavor you have on hand.

Spaghetti Squash and Tomatoes Egg in a Nest MLM.jpg

 

Ingredients:

2 Tablespoons Oil or Butter

3/4 Cup Cooked Spaghetti Squash

1 Egg

1 Tablespoon Sun-Dried Tomatoes

Dashes of Salt (to taste)

1/2 Teaspoon Dried Rosemary (or whatever spice you have on hand)

 

Directions:

  1. Heat up oil in a cast iron or non stick pan  and form the spaghetti squash nest on top of it (I have a large cast iron and formed the nest and then poured the oil into the noodles so that it would all be in one spot).
  2. Push the tomatoes into the layers of the squash wherever you like, or chop them into small pieces and sprinkle them all over it.
  3. Crack an egg into the center and let it warm through your desired level of cooked egg.
  4. Sprinkle on salt and any other spices you want.

 

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Cocobutter Clove Cookies

The bitter burst of winter clove is tamed into a bursting warmth of earth flavor in these coconut butter, pumpkin and clove cookies. 

I entered a cookie swap this year as a way to insert this little blog into the world. It is growing up and I think it is time for a coming out shindig with clove dresses and cookie hair pieces. There would be top hats with an extra brim in the form of a bowl that you could go around with while party people snatched up cookies at their mouth’s desire. 

You might think in your sprog that a little low carb and paleo human could not be part of a cookie swap, but it worked out super well. I was sent delicious almond cookies, ginger snap cookies, and some other cookies that accidentally fell to the ground after my roomies dogs figured out how to knock them from the table. 

Cocobutter Pumpkin Cookies

I can’t wait for the day where food has no labels but for being food. I can add so many diet labels to these when in reality all they are is coconut butter and pumpkin sweetly molded together with a burst of clove. So simple and yet so bold.

When only going for the qualitiest of ingredients one must learn how to be simple with recipes.

Even adding salt can flow out the pennies from your wallet, but when every ingredient is delicious you also get the best flavors. There is no compensation or need to hide any ingredient. Instead you can feature the ingredients and let them burst into yours and your guest’s mouths.

Coconut butter is a newer trend and is still costing a pretty penny to purchase, but making your own is super easy if you have time and a food processor or blender. You could also use a nut butter for these if you don’t feel like venturing into the delicious land of the coconut. Coconut lends a delicious level of sweet that is so natural you’ll want to turn into a cavewoman. There is no point to adding sweetener when you have the coconut. If you’re scared to venture out then you can go ahead and add the coconut sugar or honey, but I suggest trying them without it and sprinkling some on top if you change your mind. That way you get to try them without the sweetener but can still safely add some if you change your mind.

These cookies are also low carb, vegan, egg free, vegetarian, paleo, AIP friendly, Paleo friendly, gluten free, grain free, sugar free, nut free, and fodmap friendly. Serve these up at any party without fear, just don’t forget the brimming cookie top hats. 

 

Yield: 2 Dozen Cookies

Ingredients:

Cocobutter Cookies Ingredients.jpg

1 Cup Coconut Butter (DIY)

1/2 Cup Pumpkin Puree (DIY)

2 Teaspoons Cloves, Crushed into Tiny Bits (or pre-ground cloves)

Whole Cloves (1-2 per Cookie)

2 Tablespoons Coconut Sugar or Honey (optional)

Directions:

  1. Preheat the oven to 200 degrees for a slow bake or 350 for a quickie.
  2. Beat, or use a fork, to combine the cocobutter and pumpkin.
  3. Crush fresh cloves in a mortar and pestle into coarsely ground.
  4. Beat together the cloves and coconut sugar with the cocobutter and pumpkin.
  5. Lay the cookies out on a sheet. Since there are no lifters the size you make the cookies is the size they will turn out.
  6. Bake at 200 for 45-50  minutes or 350 for 12-15 minutes.
  7. Mouthgasm.

 

Visual Tutorial

  1. Preheat the oven.
  2. Beat the pumpkin puree and cocobutter together.
  3. Crush the cloves up:

Crushing Cloves

4. Combine all ingredients and then lay the cookies out onto a baking sheet:

Cookies on pan MLM

5. Press one or a couple of cloves into each cookie:

Cloved Cookie Sheet.jpg

 

 

 

Cocobutter Clove Cookies

Kale Chip Chicken Nuggets

Zombie fingers 2

I‘ve now had dreams of chicken nuggets spurting out the silver waste of unicorn blood.

Once you start sleeping in a hammock your dreams become as vivid as reality and so little bites of chicken, even in imagination form, caused the feeling of killing my favored horseish creature. We’ve leaped through Erasure’s voice in Always and believed in Schmendrick together. I thought my mouth was banned from chicken nuggets for life to avoid mind trauma.

This all spurred from watching Cooties, a comedy you can’t deny your mind of. This movie was so aware of its audience that it flawlessly brings out your chuckles right before soaking them in gore. Gore has always been more personally enjoyed than suspense or ear shattering music to me. The usual horror tactics work very well and I wind up jumping or…kind of…growling at the screen.

Cooties drops the common horror act and replaces Daniel Radcliffe’s horns with Elijah Wood’s hobbit gone…actually he remains pretty hobbit like. Jack McBrayer is still the gayest stereotype we’ve grown more sick of than the sickness you feel from the baby that gets bitten in this movie.

Yeah. Try to prepare for that mind trip. I’m sure Jorge Garcia will even share his shrooms with you.

Along with What We Do in the Shadows and It Follows this movie reminds you that there is more to movies than Failing Four and Jurassic Jupiter (because Jupiter lied to us about being able to rely on it too). Hopefully Cooties is still in theaters when you see this, or available on Netflix, because this movie is worthy of blisstons of praise and even kale chip encrusted recipes.

I‘m a variety human so I baked half of the chicken and fried the other half. I also coated half of the chicken in crushed up Kale chips and the other half in pork rinds. What? I’m single. Let me have pleasure.

The kale chip crackings were the most mouth soaking but pork rind fried chicken will always have its place on my fried chicken.

 

Ingredients for Cootie Free Chicken Nuggets:

The Breasts of 3 Chickens Cut into Two Inch Chunks

Enough Pickle Juice to Fill a Bag with 3 Chicken Breasts in it

(Quality of pickle juice matters, I go for TJ’s crunchicons and just pour out enough of the juice out to fill the bag and then put the lid back on and store it in the fridge)

1-2 Cups of Avocado Oil (or any frying oil)

4 Oz of Kale/Pork Rinds

or

2 Oz of Kale Shreds (I used Bombay Curry)

2 Oz Pork Skins (go for softer pork rinds and discard and super hard bits)

Final Chicken Nuggets

Prep Directions for Both the Oven and The Frying:

  1. Take a plastic bag or any dish that can hold things and put the chicken breasts in it.
  2. Fill the container with pickle juice and let it sit in the fridge overnight. Then go sleep or watch Cooties.
  3. Do not rinse off the pickle juice. It makes the kale chips or pork rinds stick to the chicken.
  4. The next day savor what you have watched and cut up the chicken into 2 inch chunks (or leave as strips).

Coated

Pan/Cast Iron Frying Directions:

  1. Coat your chicken chunks or strips in kale chips or pork rinds or both by pressing it deeply into them.
  2. Coat the bottom of a pan with enough frying oil to cover half of a chicken chunk.
  3. Fry each side for two minutes and remove from oil.

Oven Directions

  1. Set the oven to 400 degrees.
  2. Let your oven reach 400 degrees (about the time of an ARAM).
  3. Either toss your chicken in oil now then coat with kale chips or pork rinds or both, or coat them and then put the chunks in a bowl and drizzle in oil.
  4. Lay the chunks on a wire rack and set over a baking pan, or over a cupcake pan because you didn’t feel like finding a baking pan.
  5. Bake for 4 minutes and then flip and bake for 4 more minutes.

Baked vs. Fried

(Fried on the bottom baked on the top)

Fried vs Baked

For Avocado Mayo:

Ingredients

1 Avocado

1/4 Cup EVOO (list of lying ones here) or Avocado Oi

1/2 Teaspoon of Salt

1/2 Teaspoon Pepper

1/2 of a Lemon’s Juice

Sriracha (optional)

Directions:

  1. Process ingredients together or smash them a lot with a fork.
  2. Drizzle in sriracha.

CHickeN nUggEtS

Macros:

Depends on what Kale chips you use but according to all but the vegans/vegetarians/calorie counters this is healthy.

cootie-free-chicken-nuggets 2

3 Ingredient Frozen Yogurt

Frozen yogurt is a blisswirl of flavors that are so refreshing and crisp you can barely take it in your mouth.

3 Ingredient Frozen Yogurt

With summer beating down, and my body dwelling in Texas, cold is a required mouthgasm, and those ice cream trucks are taunting. Mostly to throw bombs at them because they’re really loud and that song haunts all the way into my childhood.

I Googled around and to my bliss it you can very easily make frozen yogurt if you have yogurt and a freezer. If you want the blisswirls you’ll need to add sugar, salt and an ice cream maker.

To get the best of flavors and feelings you will need fully fat yogurt from flower raised cows that appreciate being inside you. Low-fat yogurt will have more sugar and tastes like sweetened water anyways. If you still buy low-fat then I don’t understand you and we’ll have to defriend on MySpace to symbolize our friendship being as dead as it.

I have some frozen yogurt for that burn, Once you put it in your mouth you’ll come back into my arms and we’ll unite in blisswirls of mouth cream together.

Erythritol is a sugar replacement with a lower GI that is also lower in carbs and calories. It has 6% of the calories of sugar and yet is still 70% as sweet. The bacteria in your mouth can use sugar for energy but neglects erythritol as food. In fact, 90% of this sweetener is excreted from the body. For more information on erythritol click or touch this word.

I am not a lover of the sugar cravings myself, but I’ve had this frozen yogurt for three days and haven’t wanted to scarf down tons of donuts. In fact, I’ve remained in full beast mode control of cravings.

The Taste

This yogurt is swirled with a crisp refreshing taste you only get from frozen churns of cream. I daresay it beats any froyo shop, especially since you can customize it to your taste. I’ll probably make a coffee and rose flavor soon with their extracts.

Ingredients:

   1 Container of Full Fat Grass Fed Yogurt (3 and 3/4 Cups). I used Maple Hills Creamery

   1/4 Cup Erythritol, 2 T Coconut Sugar (or Sweetener of Choice)

   1/4 Teaspoon Salt

   1 Teaspoon Lemon, Coffee, Vanilla, or Choice of Flavor Extract (optional)

How to Create

   1.   Combine the yogurt, sweetener, salt and extract into a bowl and whisk together.


Whisk

   2.   Refrigerate until the concoction reaches at least 45 degrees (mine was at 35 degrees with no refrigeration)

 3.   Pour into ice cream maker and churn according to manufacturer’s instructions

Pour

   4.   Mindbliss out over your frozen yogurt.

Creamed Yogurt

Note: This will come out as a soft serve. To make harder put in the freezer for about three hours.

Serving Size: 1/2 Cup

Macros: Fat: 5g, Carbs: 5.7g, Protein, 5g

Human Friendly Stuffed Peppers

What to do with so many people trying diets and you’re just having a simple dinner party? Is there a recipe that could fit a low carb diet, a paleo diet, and a primal diet?

Peppers

Yes. Cauliflower rice stuffed peppers

Cauliflower rice is the mindblissmouthgasm of keto/paleo life.

. Rice is off the mouth menu for ketoers due to its high carb content (it is 90% carbs) and off the paleo menu because rice contains phytane which renders its nutrients essentially useless to humans. Grains usually contains gluten, which can be highly inflammatory and harmful to the gut, but rice does seem to avoid this issue. The gut plays an essential role in memory as well as can lead to depression and anxiety so amything that harms it is off the mindgasm menu. Do not fret my lovers because the gut can be fixed starting with food.

On the other hand Asians eat rice. Here is an article about the debate on rice from Mark’s Daily Apple. He does a mindful amount of research into these subjects and has dedicated his life to the primal diet and awareness of it.

So how do we get that rice bedding to our meats and veggies? How do we make sushi? We turn cauliflower into rice. All you really want from a substitute for old foods is the texture. Most humans don’t eat rice just by itself. You add cheese or spices or meat or sauces to rice to make it delicious. Usually in a combination. As such it is those flavors and the texture of rice that go so well together.

Cauliflower already tastes amazing on its own so turning it to rice makes your meal that much tastier and mindblissing.

Cauliflower is also a cheaper vegetable and if you’re on a budget it can easily replace your bagged rice.

I did discover that cheese is in the grey zone of paleo today. This is a hard fact to face but it is true that many humans do not process dairy well. We are developing the ability to process grassfed dairy products, especially goat cheese. Mark from Mark’s Daily Apple, a primal food blog, has a well structured article on the subject found if you click here.

Directions for Human Friendly Stuffed Peppers:

Ingredients

These are definitely a base recipe for you to fiddle around with. Try different oils, nuts, spices and meats if they fit all the diets you need or just fit your mouth menu for the night.

Directions:

1) First you will need to acquire three bell peppers (or more), a cauliflower, three tablespoons of oil (any will do but go for organic. I used TJ’s lemon olive oil), and a cup of nuts (I used macadamia).

2) You will then make cauliflower rice. This is actually a simple process where you trim a cauliflower and put it into a food processor or blender then pulse until is rice. If you don’t want a moist caulistuffed pepper go ahead and transfer the rice to a skillet and cook out the water for about eight minutes.

3) Combine the rice with the oil and chopped macadamia nuts.

4) Stuff the peppers with caulirice mix.

5) Spray with coconut oil (optional).

6) Can be served raw or baked in the oven at 325 for 15 minutes then checked on every 5 minutes after.

7) I did add raspberries to mine. They were delicious.

Final