Category Archives: real food

3 Way Cold Brew Coffee Tutorial

Coldly Brewed

Coldbrew is one of those things that sounds fancy and complicated and as though it will cost a fancy penny and a complicated work day.

In cold brew reality you can make incredible coffee flavors your mouth has never known with any container and something that can hold tiny coffee granules (cheesecloth, coffee filter, really fine laced leggings).

Why is Cold Brew so Superior?

  1. More Caffeine: Cold Brew has more caffeine inside it since you don’t burn out any of that delicious energy as you aren’t using hot water.
  2. Caffeine/Flavor Regulation: If you’re looking to detox on caffeine or even just regulate the amount this is the way to go. On days you need less coffee you just pour less into your bottle/liquid container. The amount is easily increased or decreased based on your mouth/body desires.
  3. The Flavor: Since you don’t burn out any of the flavor you get the depth and brightness that lies in your coffee beans. I’m tasting a beginning, middle and end of coffee notes with each moment of liquid that comes inside you.
  4. Cold Undiluted Coffee: At wretched coffee shops that need to be cast into the fires of Mount Doom they just add ice to regular brewed coffee. That is just flavored water…okay all liquid is but they do it wrong.

Raw

Ingredients for Single Life Cold Brew Coffee: (Makes Two Cups)

1 and 3/4 Cup of Finely Ground Coffee (or the size of breadcrumbs, but there’s a debate going for which grindis best)

Quality of coffee matters since you can really taste it. What you smell you’ll taste.

3 and 1/2 Cups of Filtered Cold Water (quality matters)

A French press or Liquid Container

Family Size Cold Brew

Galon Sized Jar or Liquid Holder

3 Cups Finely Ground Coffee 

A Gallon of Water Minus 3 Cups of Coffee Grounds

Method One: The French Press

This will be the easiest method since you simply grind, add water, let it sit and then press.

  1. Put about a cup of coffee into a grinder (spice grinder or coffee grinder works) and work in two to three batches.
  2. Grind up 1.75 cups of coffee on a very fine ground (for the fullest extraction of flavor).
  3. Put the grinds at the bottom of your French press.
  4. Pour 3.5 cups cold water (or room temp) into your French Press/ fill to the brim.
  5. Stir the water and grinds then cover the press with the handle fully up.
  6. Let sit erect for 12 hours and up to 24 hours.
  7. After 12 hours press all the way down and pour the coffee into a container then store in the fridge and make a few coffee ice cubes for hangover smoothies/for future use.

Method Two: Random Container and Cheesecloth/Coffee Filter

  1. Follow the first two steps from above.
  2. Put the grinds into a container, preferably with a pour spout.
  3. Pour 3.5 cups of cold or room temperature water into container.
  4. Stir the water and the grinds together or put the lid on and shake.
  5. Let sit for 12 to 24 hours and go do life things.
  6. After 12 hours have passed strain through a cheesecloth or coffee filter and store.

Method Three: Family Sized

  1. Take 3 cups of finely ground coffee and put into the bottom of a gallon sized vessel (preferably with a spigot).
  2. Pour cold or room temperature water into the grounds.
  3. Swirl the coffee and water together.
  4. Let sit for 12-24 hours and filter out  in batches.

Photo Tutorial

  1. Show off Sir Thor

Thor and Coffee

2. Grind up 1.75 cups of coffee then bring it outside for the sake of lighting

Grinded

3.  Pour water into grinds. Don’t bother going outside and just take a phone picture. Make it look artsy to distract people.

Water Pour

4.   Stir the grinds and water into each other.

Stir

4.   Put the French cover on top but leave it fully up for 12-24 hours.

Up and Wanting

5.  After 12 hours have passed press the handle all the way down.Press

6.  Store in saved up glass bottles. Try to not spill

Filter

7.   Or store into ice cube tray.

Ice Cube Storage

Method Two

   1.   Follow the steps from above but use a plastic container and filter through a coffee filter or cheesecloth.

Coffee FIlter

Method Three

Imagine Pictures Here

3 Way Cold Brew

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Cocomacanut Traveling Fat Bomb

The sound for this taste is lorsmun with a bliss tinkerings bracing the lor and leading into the smu. A mind lifting purr of pleasure.

I’ve made many a fat bomb in my little existence. In oddity I’ve never made macadamia butter into these mouthgasms. Strange due to my deep love of the macadamia. You can taste the satisfying pour of fats from its goddess insides into your mouth. It doesn’t even know me so this love is purely from my mind to yours. I daresay I’m killing more by telling you this so I’m being quite cruel to my love.

I even want all mouths to experience her deepest moments.

Traveling fat bombs are so ingenious I still barely believe I came up with them. It was purely by change really. I made energy bites from All Day I Dream About Food and then put them in an empty coffee can from Trader Joe’s. I then put some pistachio fat bombs from The Healthy Foodie on top of those and then off to the rolling road I went. The trip wound up being longer than expected and I was hungry. I tried a two day car heated fat bomb and found it even more delicious than when it was ripe from the fridge. The flavors had soaked and warmed together to bring out new notes of flavors and they melted into my tongue.

They wound up lasting five days and still being incredible.

Since then I’ve just analyzed into a simple noticement. None of the ingredients have a short shelf life.

Since this discovery I never take a roadtrip without a jar of traveling fat bombs goodness. I actually sometimes leave a jar in the car just in case sporadic hunger hits at any traveling moment. This one beasts the Brazillian nut coffee bomb so hard though. Try this one first and tell your mouth to thank me ;). Really you should think the macadamia though, but I’m sure we can have a threesome.

The base recipe.

The Inner Moments

3/4 Cup Roasted Macadamia Butter (How to: Make Your Own)

1/4 Cup Coconut Butter (How to: Make Your Own)

 2 T Coffee (Quality matters, I used a delightful coldbrew but a Chemex or French Press would do well)

1/4 Cup Unsweetened Shredded Coconut (Optional)

1/4 teaspoon ceylon cinnamon up to 1 teaspoon based on preference (Start small, taste, increase if desired)

1/4 teaspoon vanilla (I used Madagascar bourbon vanilla)

To Make it Come

Together

Pulse the above together in a food processor to desired consistency and store in a fresh jar, or reuse nut butter jar.

Macadamia and Coconut Fat Bomb Final

Roasted Macadamia Nut Butter

Just like the Brazilian the macadamia nut just loves to be buttered. There’s something glorious about the way it pulverizes into a smooth bliss cream that makes you want to have it again and again and again until it soaks everything you own and gets trapped under mouthgasming sheets.

Food is just sexy.

IMG_20150829_210920

Macadamia nuts are soaked in nutrients that other nuts just don’t have.

Most nuts (almonds, pecans, walnuts, and cashews) are higher in Omega-6 fats that cause inflammation. Inflammation is linked, by some scientific humans, to anxiety and depression. They are definitely not the most mind lingering loves and should be consumed in minimal doses. Outside of studies I’m sure you know how gross it feels to be bloated and that beer guts are naturally unattractive. Hello inflammation.

Macadamia is boosted with healthy fats and only has .36 grams of Omega-6 fats per handful (about 1/4 cup). This is compared to the almond at 3.4g. Macadamias are high in monounsaturated fat. This is the fat you find in avocados and olive oil, which by now I hope all humans consider healthy. For more information on macadamia nuts click or touch this word.

Now this butter. It uses preroasted macadamia nuts that I purchased from Sincerely Nuts. I plan to make a raw batch soon as I much prefer the flavor. This flavor is almost savory and has a sweet depth to it your mouth just gets soaked in. I might try and use for a nutmeg or garam marsala fudge. Maybe even as a nut sauce in some Asian dishes. Such noms to come.

The Taste

Savory sweet and my top mouth favorite when it comes to nut butters. Definitely the smoothest butter and tasty enough you’ll just have to try it. If you regret it just send the butter my way and I’ll send some dollars.

Ingredients:

   3 Cups of Macadamia Nuts

1/2 Teaspoon Vanilla (optional) or Madagascar Bourbon Vanilla

1/2 to 1 Teaspoon of Ceylon Cinnamon (Optional)

To Create:

   1.   Put all of the Ingredients into a food processor.

 2.   Pulse for three minutes, or even less depending on the consistency you want.

Final Timed Macadamia

Creamy Coconut Cauliflower Mash

Psssst. I have a tiny confession. Please whisper it in your head.

I no longer feel a bodily love for cheese.

Phew. I felt a releasing sense of ease just from typing that.

We grew up together you see. My body and cheese have frolicked in delicious fields of love and whimsical times. It let me have threesomes in forms of burgers and up to twentysomes in casseroles. Oh such a timeless love cheese and I fell into.

Then I met coconut and fell madly into true love.

I would not have known that cheese and I aren’t actually meant to be until I went off it for a few weeks. I went on  a mindcation and bodycation without even realizing it. Coconut butter, coconut milk, coconut pulp crackers and coconut oil were everywhere. Coconut was inside me every day.

During this week I felt clean and lively with no body air escaping my top or bottom holes.

I kept getting full on coconut creamed spinach, bison beer braised meatballs, spinach salads dosed in sunflower oils and chia seed granola bars to the point I was not hungry and did not even think of cheese.

Everyday was mental and mouthbliss.

You don’t even think of the past when captured by coconuts.

Cheese is now an ex and it might just stay that way. I know what feels and tastes better now. The moment I went back to cheese I had inflammation. I switched back to coconut and felt incredible again. Everything even tasted more incredible. My mouth taste buds adapted away from cheese and made room for a new love.

The taste of this cauliflower mash is little white trees springing to life and coating themselves in creamy and delicious coconut. Then they dance because they have never felt or tasted so good.

It is so creamy and it is so fresh tasting your mouth will crave this again and again. The more your mouth knows this taste the better it will be because of all those antioxidant soakings and all of the nutrients locked in those cauliflower tiny trees. It even holds anti-inflammatory benefits. Inflammation is linked to depression, anxiety and general fatness.

This mash also keeps really well for at least two days, and if you reheat it in cast iron with bacon the grease soaks right in and makes even more mouthgasm moments.

Creamy Coconut Cauliflower Mash

IMG_20150826_161621

Mouthgasm Moments:

1 Head of Cauliflower

2 T Coconut Cream

1 T Coconut Oil

Salt and Pepper

To Create:

   1.   Break the cauliflower into chunks. Save the leaves and bottom chunk for vegetable broth to be made later

   2.   Boil the cauliflower for 10 minutes until soft

   3.   Drain cauliflower and put all of the ingredients into a blender and blend until smooth, occasionally scraping down the sides

   4.   Salt and pepper to taste

For Cauliflower Rice

If you want cauliflower rice just pulse this recipe instead of reaching the smooth consistency.

For the Microwave:

   1.   Follow direction one above

   2.   Put cauliflower in microwave safe dish with the cream and oil. Microwave for six minutes.

   3.   Stir to coat and then microwave for four to six more minutes.

   4.   Put cauliflower into blender and blend until smooth.

   5.   Salt and pepper to taste.

Coconut Mash

Nutrition Comparison: 

Potato: Fat: .2 g, Potassium: 897 mg, Carbs: 37 g, Protein: 4.3 g, Vitamin C: 70% DV, Calcium: 2% DV, Magnesium: 12% DV

Cauliflower: Fat: 1.6g, Potassium: 1,758 mg, Carbs: 29, Net Carbs: 17, Protein: 11g, Vitamin C: 472 % DV, Calcium: 12% DV, Iron: 13% DV, Magnesium: 22% DV, Vitamin B-6: 55% DV

Cauliflower also has strong detox benefits as well as antioxidants. It is a nutrient lovebliss of moments your body needs inside it.

Lemon Coconut Creamed Spinach

Ignore all other recipes for this one. No flavor has erupted me into mindmouthbliss as this coconut creamed red spinach leaves bursted through with lemon ever has.

I even created a new word for it. These are the sounds of the taste. Flisseneeun with an accompanying moan of blissgasms. Think these sounds when you taste the creamed leaves and know truth.

Slowly yet within awarity I’ve been slipping away from cow products. Since I believe grass fed is not a corruption of animal, and I found a farm to get meat directly from, this is not an environmental construct. I enjoy the vegan community immensely and find then to be loving Earth dwellers instead of the cavern freaks I’d boxed them into. They do fight for something and thus we assume they have boxing gloves on at all times, but what I see is mostly a love for all things veggies. They truly love their food and have a connection to it.

I was going to make a creamed spinach recipe with cream cheese and red heirloom spinach, but as I took out the cream cheese I realized I didn’t want it. I wanted a vegan recipe that still dwelled out delicious mouthgasms.

Not just for the vegans either. My body signaled desires for the coconut and I try to listen to those desires.

In The Raw

There was my freshly made coconut cream (high powered blend of coconut flakes or minutes of food processing). I gently warmed the spinach in lemon oil and then creamed it with the coconut. Oh mouthing bliss this is better than any cream cheese variety I’ve ever had. The coconut creamed just melts right over the leaves yet maintains a coconut texture. It melts and molds more than cream cheese, as though they are meant to be within each other.

The Bliss Mouth Moment:

Coconut cream and spinach melt so well together there is no longer separation but instead a full burst of two flavors. The lemon bursts them together so three flavors make one. I suggest having nothing before or after this the first time your mouth learns it. My mouth felt like creamed fresh bliss even an hour after, as did the friend’s I put it inside of.

Mindgasm Moments:

   3 Cups Red Heirloom Spinach (Trader Joe’s has this, or use regular spinach)

   3 Tablespoons Lemon Olive OIl (Trader Joe’s also has this, but I’ll make a recipe for it soon)

   If you do not have lemon olive oil use the juice of half a lemon and two teaspoons of lemon zest

   1/4 Cup Coconut Butter

To Create Mindbliss:

   1.   Consume a raw leaf and raw coconut with corgi in the background to let your mouth know all layers of flavor.

RawBliss

   2.   Gently warm olive oil in a pan, about ten seconds, and add spinach.

   3.   Let spinach gently wilt but don’t allow any oil popping to occur

   4.   Spoon in coconut butter and let melt

    5.   Immediately consume

Coconut Creamed Spinach

Chocolate Lemon Whipping Cream

When first beginning my low carb journey I feared the fats.

My brain was told low fat was the healthy choice and I should eat veggies low in calories with sides of fries I would dip into loaded potatoes. Sometimes I would put those bites on crackers. Carb loaded carbs I crunched into my soul.

I never enjoyed milk.

People kept pouring milk into my body, but it was never accepted into the tasty foods category of my nutrient centers. Milk went straight down the rejection digestion hole. It tasted like flavored water with some texture swirled in. Ick. I ate cereal dry except for frosted flakes.  Those would get milk poured on their tops and then I’d eat the flakes out, pour another crunchy sweet bowl, eat the flakes again, and then drink the finally delicious flavored milk. Chocolate could also work to make it nommy. Basically, I enjoyed the flavors put into the milk and then the texture enough to enjoy milk. Chocolate raspberry milk anyone?

Don’t worry. I’ll make a healthy swirl of that mind deliciousgasm soon.

My parents tended to get the low fat foods because they were told it was the healthy way to raise wee children. All I liked was cottage cheese in the low fat regard, or some yogurts with berries mixed in. I needed flavors to get trapped within.

What the low fat tycoons do is suck out the fat from foods and add sugar.

The low fat movement would have never survived if they just sucked out the fat because it tastes horrid. They added sugar and addicted America. Woo. If you do not believe such words try going off of sugar for a week and feel the withdrawals.

Your body craves fat as a nutrient source. To get control back of your body and mind this has to be accepted.

Once your body knows fats it will mouthbliss out on them. The body knows what it needs, but if you keep putting odd things in it will adapt. The human body is incredible like that. You will crave what you’ve been putting inside yourself because that is what your body knows.

Time to retrain your mind and body into blissing food connections.

Here. I even made a song for you about it. I promise no viruses. I’m just taking you to Soundcloud.

Heavily Creamed Lemon Treat Ingredients

The Recipe of Blissgasming Cream:

I drank heavy cream straight for a while before wanting to bliss it up. The fat became incredible to my body and mind to where it soaked me in mouthgasms at the slightest creamy touch. Eventually I wanted to lace it with more drenched soaking moments. I squeezed in lemon juice and shaved some dark chocolate on top. I did this for weeks and one time I added too much lemon juice and decided to mouthbliss it into me anyways.

Oh my. It hardened into creamed fluff. I know that sounds contradicting but that is how incredible this treat is.

It is blissschaos being held.

Mouthblisses Needed:

     3/4 Cup Heavy Cream (organic or if you’re lucky grassfed. Supernatural is my favored brand for all things cow cream)

    Half the Squeezed Juices of  a Lemon. Get this thing to avoid seeds.

    90% Chocolates Bar, about a tablespoon but up to your desires.

To Create Mindbliss:

   1.  Squeeze the Lemon’s Juice into the Cream

   2.  Let sit for a Minute for the Lemon to Soak and harden the Cream

  3.  Shave or Chop Chocolate and Dress

  4.  Feel with Taste the Mouthgasms.

Heavily Creamed Lemon Treat

How to: Travel like a Healthy Human

I‘ve now been on a real food low carb eating lifestyle for two years now (mostly). My body and mind now know what it feels like to cheat and react with sickening stomach quakes or mental ick fields of muddled connections. I’m on these lifestyles to combat mental illnesses that I’ve struggled with ever since I was twelve and downed three energy drinks laced with sour patch kids every day. When that high no longer got me going I dipped sugar cubes into icing.

Maybe I’m preset to get those illnesses or maybe they’re from those mind altering chemicals.

I had the energy drinks/various sugar highs when my brain was developing, and maybe it developed with them to the point it glitched. The ADHD, OCD, anxiety, and suicidal thoughts all leave when I go at least three days without cheating, and I continue to not connect to those mental disorders as long as I don’t cheat.

I mostly stick to my diet when on vacation through my traveling fat bombs or just by finding my own foods.

At a cafe I got an omelette and my twin got french toast with peanut butter bacon and bananas.

vy0apj8

Yesterday I cheated because there were caramels coated in chocolate with salt dredgings.

I love those things. Despite my mind saying those things will hurt my body didn’t listen. My mind gave in to just one. Then two and then three. Then I drank some Kahlua white russian with a side of wine.

This pain seared right behind my ears. This used to happen all the time before I went on keto/paleo and if I don’t cheat it goes away. I’ve linked it to being too much sugar and especially too much wine. My twin, Abbey, still deals with the pain, in the same spot, on occasion.

My OCD tinkered last night and I could not stop arranging the cars in our Magic game to line up with the tiles on the table. I couldn’t untrap those connections. I could not connect away/think of anything else but making the lines on the cards line up with the other lines. Consuming consumption. I was even aware of what was happening and was unable to control it.

This morning I was still pretty trapped and had to find a way to release that entrapment of connections.

I have an identical twin that still struggles with all of these things and continues to eat grains and processed foods. Grr.

This morning I just wanted to feel sane and in control again. I resorted to an offbeat of my dandelion greens salad. 

For Uplifting Mind Tingles
For Uplifting Mind Tingles

For the Salad:

Dandelion Greens

Lemon

Cucumber (optional)

Salt

Pepper

Very Dark Chocolate

Directions:

Turn into salad. Yes eat the peel and pulp, ultimate mind tingles.

Another item that really helps prevent cheating is a liquid carrier. This bottle is my bliss.

I go on no physical ventures without this dripping beauty wetting my sprog and body. Ever since I drank from the crisp inner wells the desire has never left and never has that taste faltered no matter what goes in it.

S'Well

 I generally do water with extracts (guide to come) or tea or coffee. All without sugar.

Random Professional Human Tips:

  1. Carry around a bottle of oil (coconut, various). If coconut pour add to coffee, others add to salads or whatever your mind body desires.
  2. Bring mind food for road trips: kale, spinach, chard, green things.
  3. Drink a ton of water.
  4. Bring extracts.
  5. Bring tobacco if you like it.
  6. Learn drinks you can have at any bar. I do a gin and soda water with lime.