Tag Archives: coconut

Cocomilk Chai Latte

Ze Cocomilk Chai Pour MLM

Mmmmm winter is finally coming, and with it must be a drink worthy of a night spent with Margaery.

The earthy spices are finally in the minds of everyone and spreading like cinnamon icing across our foods and dripping into our drinks with cinnamon laced in ginger, fennel, cloves, and even anise.

My humble human mouth is not yet a fan of anise, it tastes like licorice was steeped for twenty hours and then someone tried to turn it to wine.

Wine Love (1)

It just tastes wrong and should not exist.

In my little version of reality this will not be true for long. Taste has to do with your body accepting foods as energy sources, and it simply feared anise because it was new. That was a year ago so right now it may even taste of licorice dripping out of a gorgeous chocolate hinted Merlot.

Coco Milk Chai Holding

Cinnamon sweetly touching ginger and fondling cardamon, black pepper, and cloves should happen every day. Coconut milk has this mouth dripping quality of not overpowering flavors while maintaining that creamy feeling you want from a latte.

Coconut in itself lends a new flavor for lattes that compliments and strengthens the spicy nature of Chai tea. 

Coconut also has its own sweetness despite being sugar free, and allows for very little need when it comes to extra sweetening. Try minimal sweetener and then increase if you feel you must, but the less sweetener the more you can taste the chai 😉

Final Cocomilk Chai Latte

Ingredients:

4 Oz of Fresh Water (quality matters)

1/4 Teaspoon Blue Lotus Masala Chai

(They use a powdered form which makes steeping unnecessary

Or Make Your Own like a beast human

(You’ll surpass my beastliness since I just used the powder)

4 Oz Full Fat Coconut Milk

(Or make your own)

1/8 Tsp Coconut Suga

(For paleo or Erythitrol for a low carb / keto version, coconut will lend a more earthy note)

Outside Coco Milk Chai

Directions:

  1. Boil the coconut milk and water together. If you made your own cocomilk and stored it in the fridge then be sure to add chunks of the cream layer that forms for maximal creaminess.
  2. Right when the cocomilk and water reach boiling stir in the Masla Chai or steep your own chai.
  3. Sweeten and let cool before consuming. My hurt tongue serves as reminder penance.

Chai Holding

Recipe notes:

Making your own coconut milk can definitely be cheaper over time and is so simple that I do it about once a week.

Make sure to use full fat coconut milk otherwise it will taste thin.

P.S. You’re beautiful <(^_^)>

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Whipped Coconut Cream and Berries Hardened by Granola

Whipped Two

If you have leftover coconut whipped cream from the hangover smoothie I have the words on what to do with it. 

I suddenly have become aware of all the words I’m using. Has it become too many?

I haven’t actually experimented with any aspect of what this whipped coconut cream can do in comparison to cow whipped cream, or goat whipped cream (Mmmmm *suddenly mind soaked*), but I have topped it with berries and granola now. You deserve this in your mouth, and I couldn’t just let you leave that cream in the fridge. Cream is meant to be on your lips or inside you. 

Whipped Coconut Cream and Berries Hardened by Granola

Whipped Coconut Crea

Raspberries (or any other berry)

Granola Crumbles from All Day I Dream About Food  Cherry Granola Bars 

(I did mint instead of cherries and it was delicious)

(or any low carb or paleo granola you desire)

Optionally Added: Hemp Seeds, Chia Seeds, Cocoa Powder, Erythitrol (for keto),Coconut Sugar (for Paleo)

Directions:

  1. Let the coconut cream get warm. If you’ve left it in the fridge it needs some calming down time, as my mouth discovered.
  2. Top with berries and granola bits. The frozen ones defrost very quickly and it allows you to get incredible berries even if you live in the Lubbock desert. I use Cascadian Farms sometimes. I found a better brand but I’m not at home and Google didn’t find it.
  3. Add whatever else your mouth desires.

Whipped Coconut

Ish Macros (high variance and not counting granola) Total Carbs: 4.4, Net Carbs: 3.6, Fat: 14.1g, Protein: 1g

Low Carb and Paleo Hangover Smoothie

Humans keep having this assumption that I eat like a butterfly.

That’s very cute, but what I lose in bread and rice I make up for in butters and fats. I’m an odd little high fat person as I mostly use coconut oil/butter instead of dairy products. Although I consume 30 or less carbs a day I get 90% of my energy from fats. I used to drink heavy cream straight, such as in the heavy cream treat. Lately I’ve gone dairy free though since it feels uncomfortable to my insides every time I put cheese or cream in there. So I’ve just switched to coconut and food tastes even better.

I also eat tons of bacon. And then cast iron vegetables up with the grease.

There are days I’ll eat no meat or just some organ meat, but even on those days I get fats otherwise. Why the high carb low fat diet does not work is people wind up feeling starved. People wind up cheating and feeling terrible, as though they did something wrong. The body needs fat, and it tells us that.

So my weekend had kiwi chia jelly shots and melting coffee cocktails.

On this morning I want bliss soaked fats covered in bacon, with some electrolytes from salt. Most hangovers are dehydration so drinking water and boosting up those excreted electrolytes will help you feel mindloose and headache free.

Hangover Smoothie

Hangover Cocktail Ingredients

2 Slices of Bacon

1/2 Cup Almond or Coconut Milk (or Cashew). Increase for thinner smoothie.

1/4 Cup Frozen Raspberries (or blueberries, snozberries, or blackberries)

1/2 Cup Full Fat Greek Yogurt. (Leave out to decrease fat if needed, or add more coconut cream if dairy free).

1/2 an Avocado

1/2 a Teaspoon of Cinnamon

1/2 a Teaspoon of Salt

3 Coffee Cubes (freeze your leftover coffee into cubes)

Sweetener if you need it (I’m a bitter loving beastwoman and take it straight)

For Whipped Coconut Cream

1 Can Coconut Milk

(Great coconut whipped cream recipe, and what brand to buy here)

or

Heavy Cream turned into Whipped Cream

To Create:

  1. Cook bacon and put aside
  2. Blend cocktail Ingredients (except for bacon) in a high speed blender until smooth

To Make Coconut Whipped Cream

  1.  Leave can of coconut milk in fridge overnight
  2. Scoop off the cream layer into a stand mixer or hand mixer bowl
  3. Beat into stiff peaks
  4. This will leave you with extra cream. If you do not desire extra whipped coconut cream use less of the milk and store or put into smoothie

Combine:

  1. Pour smoothie ingredients into stein
  2. Top with whipped coconut cream
  3. Add raspberries and bacon
  4. Eat bacon first

Final Hangover Smoothie

Creamy Coconut Cauliflower Mash

Psssst. I have a tiny confession. Please whisper it in your head.

I no longer feel a bodily love for cheese.

Phew. I felt a releasing sense of ease just from typing that.

We grew up together you see. My body and cheese have frolicked in delicious fields of love and whimsical times. It let me have threesomes in forms of burgers and up to twentysomes in casseroles. Oh such a timeless love cheese and I fell into.

Then I met coconut and fell madly into true love.

I would not have known that cheese and I aren’t actually meant to be until I went off it for a few weeks. I went on  a mindcation and bodycation without even realizing it. Coconut butter, coconut milk, coconut pulp crackers and coconut oil were everywhere. Coconut was inside me every day.

During this week I felt clean and lively with no body air escaping my top or bottom holes.

I kept getting full on coconut creamed spinach, bison beer braised meatballs, spinach salads dosed in sunflower oils and chia seed granola bars to the point I was not hungry and did not even think of cheese.

Everyday was mental and mouthbliss.

You don’t even think of the past when captured by coconuts.

Cheese is now an ex and it might just stay that way. I know what feels and tastes better now. The moment I went back to cheese I had inflammation. I switched back to coconut and felt incredible again. Everything even tasted more incredible. My mouth taste buds adapted away from cheese and made room for a new love.

The taste of this cauliflower mash is little white trees springing to life and coating themselves in creamy and delicious coconut. Then they dance because they have never felt or tasted so good.

It is so creamy and it is so fresh tasting your mouth will crave this again and again. The more your mouth knows this taste the better it will be because of all those antioxidant soakings and all of the nutrients locked in those cauliflower tiny trees. It even holds anti-inflammatory benefits. Inflammation is linked to depression, anxiety and general fatness.

This mash also keeps really well for at least two days, and if you reheat it in cast iron with bacon the grease soaks right in and makes even more mouthgasm moments.

Creamy Coconut Cauliflower Mash

IMG_20150826_161621

Mouthgasm Moments:

1 Head of Cauliflower

2 T Coconut Cream

1 T Coconut Oil

Salt and Pepper

To Create:

   1.   Break the cauliflower into chunks. Save the leaves and bottom chunk for vegetable broth to be made later

   2.   Boil the cauliflower for 10 minutes until soft

   3.   Drain cauliflower and put all of the ingredients into a blender and blend until smooth, occasionally scraping down the sides

   4.   Salt and pepper to taste

For Cauliflower Rice

If you want cauliflower rice just pulse this recipe instead of reaching the smooth consistency.

For the Microwave:

   1.   Follow direction one above

   2.   Put cauliflower in microwave safe dish with the cream and oil. Microwave for six minutes.

   3.   Stir to coat and then microwave for four to six more minutes.

   4.   Put cauliflower into blender and blend until smooth.

   5.   Salt and pepper to taste.

Coconut Mash

Nutrition Comparison: 

Potato: Fat: .2 g, Potassium: 897 mg, Carbs: 37 g, Protein: 4.3 g, Vitamin C: 70% DV, Calcium: 2% DV, Magnesium: 12% DV

Cauliflower: Fat: 1.6g, Potassium: 1,758 mg, Carbs: 29, Net Carbs: 17, Protein: 11g, Vitamin C: 472 % DV, Calcium: 12% DV, Iron: 13% DV, Magnesium: 22% DV, Vitamin B-6: 55% DV

Cauliflower also has strong detox benefits as well as antioxidants. It is a nutrient lovebliss of moments your body needs inside it.

The Traveling Fat Bombs

IMG_20150801_222413 (1)

Have you ever done the deed? Have you ever cheated?

I know that cinnamon roll was tempting you. It called out your name and offered sweet pleasure. It just begged to be inside you.
That Starbucks frappacinno was dripping for you and she doesn’t get wet for just anyone.
That potato was even hard for you. How could you not let something so hard, just for you, inside you?

Don’t worry I have the solution and it is even more delicious. Traveling healthyfat fatbombs. They’re dripping with coffee and hardened by oils. Lick them and taste delicious extracts. They even last for days and can be fully enjoyed for just one if you desire. Then store them away until you want them again.

The largest cheating epidemic we face in keto/paleo/primal land is when we travel. When you get hungry those inhibitions flounder and there is rarely a kombucha or bulletproof coffee stream nearby. On keto you can go for lettuce wraps at fast food joins but in paleo land we avoid fast food at all 99 cents costs. There is way too much nonflower-raised, fake nutrients, in those joints. Every time I try to go for fast food now I get sick and then hungry again five minutes later. I really miss you In-N-Out. I never wanted it to be this way. Our love was meant to be forever. Torchy’s bowls and Chipotle still give mouthgasms every time.

Traveling Keto/Paleo Friendly Foods:

Boiled Eggs: Last two days

Baked Eggs: Alton Brown recipe here. Makes 12 perfect eggs or more.

Grassfed Jerky: Noms

Kale: Lasts two days

Spinach: Lasts the car ride

Nut Butters: Woot

Coconut Butter: Infinite mouth lasting time

Ghee: Delicious healthy fat that also lasts a long time

Coconut Oil: Another delicious healthy fat you can just scoop out and consume

Canned Fish: Quality matters

Canned Meats in General: Go for organic to maintain paleo

Nuts: Same as nut butters

Broccoli/Cauliflower/Radishes: Last four days. For mndgasming.

Paleo Exclusive: Potatoes/Other Root Veggies: Last many days and if you’re a beast can be eaten raw

The Traveling Fat Bombs

What I prefer to do is mix my fats together into a travel friendly jar. These jars don’t have any refrigeration necessary items so they’ve lasted me up to months in the cupboard. I usually keep them in the fridge until travel time just in case though. In the car they’ve been heated in Texas sun and are still delicious the next day. I enjoy most edibles and liquids at varying temperatures though so your mouth might have to adapt in ways mine already loves.

You don’t necessarily need fat bombs on your keto or paleo journey but if you’re in keto you need to get your energy from fats. If you’re into paleo then by now you have most likely embraced fats in all their satisfying glory as well. These bombs don’t have to be for travel and can just be scooped and nommed at any point of the day. I generally have a bomb before work to avoid cheating. There’s loaded fries at work.

Basic Recipe:

1 Cup Nut Butter, 1/2 Cup Coconut Butter or Oil, 1/4 Cup Liquid, Teaspoon of Extract. Process and make bombs or put in jar.

Optional Add Ins: Coconut Flakes, whole nuts, various things I can’t think of right now

For this Recipe:

I combined coffee and peanut butter, a deep mouth love of mine. I highly recommend mating the two at some point in your life. You also get your caffeine in while traveling.

Ingredients:

Travel Ingredients

1/2 Cup Homemade Brazilian Nut Butter (Recipe here)

1/2 Cup Trader Joe’s Raw Almond Butter

1/4 Cup Coffee (Quality matters, flavor comes through. I used a French Pressed one)

1 Teaspoon Neilsen Massey Bourbon Vanilla Extract (Quality/Flavor comes through)

Directions:

Put all ingredients in a food processor and pulse to combine.

Store in same jar you took the nut butter from or turn into mustaches.

Traveling Fat Bombs

Jar Time

Yields 24 Tablespoon size servings:

Macros: Total Fat: 10.7g Total Carb: 2.23g Net Carb: 1.84, Protein: 1.57g