Tag Archives: lowcalorie

3 Way Cold Brew Coffee Tutorial

Coldly Brewed

Coldbrew is one of those things that sounds fancy and complicated and as though it will cost a fancy penny and a complicated work day.

In cold brew reality you can make incredible coffee flavors your mouth has never known with any container and something that can hold tiny coffee granules (cheesecloth, coffee filter, really fine laced leggings).

Why is Cold Brew so Superior?

  1. More Caffeine: Cold Brew has more caffeine inside it since you don’t burn out any of that delicious energy as you aren’t using hot water.
  2. Caffeine/Flavor Regulation: If you’re looking to detox on caffeine or even just regulate the amount this is the way to go. On days you need less coffee you just pour less into your bottle/liquid container. The amount is easily increased or decreased based on your mouth/body desires.
  3. The Flavor: Since you don’t burn out any of the flavor you get the depth and brightness that lies in your coffee beans. I’m tasting a beginning, middle and end of coffee notes with each moment of liquid that comes inside you.
  4. Cold Undiluted Coffee: At wretched coffee shops that need to be cast into the fires of Mount Doom they just add ice to regular brewed coffee. That is just flavored water…okay all liquid is but they do it wrong.

Raw

Ingredients for Single Life Cold Brew Coffee: (Makes Two Cups)

1 and 3/4 Cup of Finely Ground Coffee (or the size of breadcrumbs, but there’s a debate going for which grindis best)

Quality of coffee matters since you can really taste it. What you smell you’ll taste.

3 and 1/2 Cups of Filtered Cold Water (quality matters)

A French press or Liquid Container

Family Size Cold Brew

Galon Sized Jar or Liquid Holder

3 Cups Finely Ground Coffee 

A Gallon of Water Minus 3 Cups of Coffee Grounds

Method One: The French Press

This will be the easiest method since you simply grind, add water, let it sit and then press.

  1. Put about a cup of coffee into a grinder (spice grinder or coffee grinder works) and work in two to three batches.
  2. Grind up 1.75 cups of coffee on a very fine ground (for the fullest extraction of flavor).
  3. Put the grinds at the bottom of your French press.
  4. Pour 3.5 cups cold water (or room temp) into your French Press/ fill to the brim.
  5. Stir the water and grinds then cover the press with the handle fully up.
  6. Let sit erect for 12 hours and up to 24 hours.
  7. After 12 hours press all the way down and pour the coffee into a container then store in the fridge and make a few coffee ice cubes for hangover smoothies/for future use.

Method Two: Random Container and Cheesecloth/Coffee Filter

  1. Follow the first two steps from above.
  2. Put the grinds into a container, preferably with a pour spout.
  3. Pour 3.5 cups of cold or room temperature water into container.
  4. Stir the water and the grinds together or put the lid on and shake.
  5. Let sit for 12 to 24 hours and go do life things.
  6. After 12 hours have passed strain through a cheesecloth or coffee filter and store.

Method Three: Family Sized

  1. Take 3 cups of finely ground coffee and put into the bottom of a gallon sized vessel (preferably with a spigot).
  2. Pour cold or room temperature water into the grounds.
  3. Swirl the coffee and water together.
  4. Let sit for 12-24 hours and filter out  in batches.

Photo Tutorial

  1. Show off Sir Thor

Thor and Coffee

2. Grind up 1.75 cups of coffee then bring it outside for the sake of lighting

Grinded

3.  Pour water into grinds. Don’t bother going outside and just take a phone picture. Make it look artsy to distract people.

Water Pour

4.   Stir the grinds and water into each other.

Stir

4.   Put the French cover on top but leave it fully up for 12-24 hours.

Up and Wanting

5.  After 12 hours have passed press the handle all the way down.Press

6.  Store in saved up glass bottles. Try to not spill

Filter

7.   Or store into ice cube tray.

Ice Cube Storage

Method Two

   1.   Follow the steps from above but use a plastic container and filter through a coffee filter or cheesecloth.

Coffee FIlter

Method Three

Imagine Pictures Here

3 Way Cold Brew

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Melting Coffee Gomptail: Flask Ready

Only healthy recipes my mind says. Only give humanity and your eye swankers foods and liquids that will invigorate their minds and give them back mental control. 

What if health fucks around and lies to us about what it is all the blisslong day?

Halfly I’m a health goddess that cares deeply for all human minds and bodies. I’m also a fairy rebel that trips on chaos and lands in bliss bubbles that melt as they float.

So what do fairies drink when they want mind soaking blissgasms?

Oh, what about the blissfuck of car bombs? That stimulant downing. Those mind dropping mouthgasms that struggle you right back up.

I’m sure I’ll have cancer by tomorrow, but breathing can have those side affects.

Combining caffeine and alcohol is very very bad. It makes you very naughty and here is the article for why not to drink this. Basically, humans will stay up and drink longer and it dehydrates you like a pump stuck in your water parts. So if you drink water and have a fuzzy blanket all will be well.

Gomp Me

The Taste:

Like flowers burning and melting on your tongue. The flavors actually change from beginning to end from earthy to bright and then ends in a combination. Don’t you just have to know what coffee melting tastes like?

Can also be flasked.

Bombgredients:

1 Shot Gin (Gompers is best)

1/2 Cup Cold Brew Coffee (or regular coffee)

For Chocolate Dusting:

Spray glass with coconut spray and dust chocolate over. You could add coconut sugar to cut the bitter. I recommend taking it black like a beast human.

Melting coffee final

The mindchuckle is this recipe is actually FODMAP friendly(have you heard about gluten free being scientifically discounted? It’s the FODMAPS our bodies don’t accept. It is also sugar free, dairy free, nut free, gluten free (to care or not to care now?), fat free, low carb, keto friendly, paleo friendly, and primal friendly. Yet it could totally kill you. Enjoy.